(Music and Lyrics: Kylie Buddin and Sam Mullins)

Look at the Englishmen
They got dignified smiles
Slanted and crooked, unholy mouths
Sometimes I wonder if they’d won the war
Would we take our tea at 4 in the afternoon?
Would we be older and wiser too?
And would the Beatles hail from Brooklyn?

If George Washington never chopped a cherry tree
What of poor young Johnny Appleseed
How wonderful for that Union pride
I want to become so dignified
But wouldn’t we all have funny teeth?

The Queen Mum stands, politely waves
To the land of the Free and the Home of the Brave
Would those words mean a thing?
Would we pay our bills in pounds and pence?
Would Andy Lloyd Weber make more sense?
If Paul Revere had loved the King.

If George Washington never chopped a cherry tree
What of poor young Johnny Rottenseed
How wonderful for that Union pride
I want to become so dignified
But wouldn’t we all have ….
Funny little cars that don’t use much gasoline
A prince and a duke and a proper queen
Instead of REO we’d have XTC
If we’d just thrown the war