Small Talk

(Music and Lyrics:  Sam Mullins)

So I’m standing at this party that won’t end
Watching you confide in your best friend
And I start to feel a pang of jealousy
‘Cause the company I found is misery

Stock brokers, bond traders
Bulls and bears, how ‘bout those Gators
Countless people telling me
It’s not the heat it’s humidity.

What’s your handicap?
Where do you play?
Pleased to meet you
Nice weather today
When I was in the Army
I could shoot par
But ever since my surgery
I just play guitar

An hour later that same guy
Said my life has been simplified
‘Cause Oprah Winfrey’s telling me
What books to read and shows to see

I don’t want to analyze the game
I don’t want to hear about their stocks
Every conversation seems the same
Come and rescue me from all this small talk.

Ten O’Clock it’s burgundy
10:15 a nice chablis
By a quarter til 12 the Cuervo’s out
Boombox cranking Roundabout
We got hokey-pokey and pictionary
Karaoke and bloody mary’s

House husbands, social climbers
I’d be rich if I got a dime for
Every time that someone gave me
A morning-after remedy.

I don’t want to memorize their names
I don’t want to lip synch classic rock
Every conversation seems the same
Come and rescue me from all this small talk

So I’m standing at this party that won’t end.

King Martian

(Music and Lyrics:  Stu Mullins)

You feel that magic is true
And miracles are too
You have faith in rumors and lies
And the neighbors all are spies

If only I was King Martian or better yet
A great remote viewer
Or master of the Internet

You eat primordial soup
And bought that autopsy coup
You talk about riding on Hale Bop
But that’s something I can’t top

If only I was King Martian
Or maybe a cosmonaut
Al Bell will tell you it’s all part of a counter-plot

But maybe I just lack the vision to see
How the moons of Jupiter relate to me.

If I was weird enough to follow that plot
I’d join you in your search for Camelot

If I were King Martian
If I were a Martian…