Kindergarten

(Music and Lyrics: Gordy Axt)

They say all I need to know
I learned in kindergarten
A classic New Age decree
Share and share alike
And always use the buddy system
Don’t forget to say please.

I can’t relate
It’s more complicated than children at play
And all of my friends, they have their own agendas today.

I brought some donuts in to share with all my office buddies
A pleasant start to the week
We generally seem to get along a whole lot better
If we don’t have to speak
But when the sugar high and caffeine buzz begins to mellow
The truth is easy to see
The playground’s different now, the faces older but not much wiser
How did this happen to me?

I need relief from middle age beliefs
Seeds I don’t want to sow
Who changed the rules since grammar school?
That’s all I want to know

Milk and cookies
Nap time after story hour sounds okey-dokey to me
No counting carbs, no counting fat grams
Just drink your milk and eat your peas

They say all I need to know
Is in the Times and Wall Street Journal
My brother told me so
But I get bored with small print
When it’s time for story hour
I’d rather read Thoreau
You know…

Weren’t things just great in K through 8?
I’ve got a plan to play kick the can
Today, today

Nadine

(Music and Lyrics: Sam Mullins)

There’s an awkward fellow who hides behind his blinds
Tells his neighbors that he knows what’s on their minds
When his little baby dances naked on the lawn
A place she likes to call her backyard Babylon.
Martini marathon
They won’t stop ‘til dawn.

When the sun comes up
A girl in a yellow pickup truck says,
“Have you seen Nadine?”

There’s a young policeman with a ticket in his hand
He says “You’ve gotta have a permit for this band”
But then he sees her dancing, shaking to and fro
And he says, “I’m inclined to let you go.
Call it quid pro quo.
On with the show!”

When the sun goes down
A boy in the a green Corvette comes round and says,
“Have you seen Nadine?”

Life is brief, life is dear
Life is grief, death is near
Daddy don’t you realize there’s more to life than fear.
Life is now, life is here.

There’s an awkward fellow pulling garbage from the pool
While he suffers from his neighbor’s ridicule
“You know you treat that girl as if she’s Lady Di.”
The awkward fellow just shakes his head and sighs.
Looks to the sky.
“Why, God, Why?”

When the whistle blows.
A man with a Marlon Brando nose says,
“She’s a little bit mean….Nadine.”